I’ve been thinking a lot about baseball this ‘preseason’. It’s weird because usually when Cole isn’t playing ball I don’t think about it much. I’m pretty busy taking care of all the projects I can complete in the ‘off season’.
This year has been an exception. It seems like I think about it A LOT; this final season, this senior year, this end of the big show in our little world. We moved this fall and while Cole will probably never really ‘live’ in our new house I couldn’t resist setting up his room again just as it has been for years. The walls are heavy with awards and plaques and all the dressers are covered in trophies. I lovingly unpacked the memories and thought about each award as I found a place for it, remembering where we were and the games leading up to the big event. There is a decade of memories in that room but there are so many more that weren’t engraved on a plaque but in our hearts and our minds and will be for years to come.
Last night we went to the College of Charleston basketball game and there on the jumbo-tron at half time flashed a picture of three of our baseball players (including my son) with an advertisement for the upcoming season. I’m not gonna lie, I almost cried. There they were, Matt Leeds, Rob Kral and Cole looking all serious and mean and I had to reflect on the differences from the first time I met them four years ago.
I ran into people at the game who stopped me to talk about this, the ‘last season’. How was Cole feeling about it, what were his plans after the season, what is his take on the team this year. First I need to say that if you know Cole well you know that these are all things he doesn’t talk about outside the team much. He’ll give you a one liner which usually contains the word fine but that’s about it. What I really wanted to say to those folks is this is so much more than a 2011 CofC Baseball Season. It is so much more than a senior year. We started traveling with this kid when he was eleven years old, as did most of the parents of players who play at this level. We have lived in hotel rooms and condos every spring and summer for the last ten years. We have rolled in to the driveway after midnight only to get up at 6:00 AM to go to work the next day more times than we can count and we wouldn’t trade a single dollar or moment we have sacrificed to live this life. So when you ask me how Cole feels about this possibly being his last season forgive me if I get a little teary eyed because it’s my last season too. One thing I know for sure is that you only get one shot to live in the moment. You get one chance to see the ball come off the bat for the winning hit, that drove in the go ahead run, at a midweek game, in the rain close to midnight and in that moment you get to see the bench clear and run to second base to lift up that freshman who made it happen (who happens to be your kid). We live our whole lives for moments like that. So, while this preseason is a little bitter sweet I know that at the end of the season (and I hope it is in Omaha) I will be sad that it is over but so glad I stayed for the ‘whole game’. If my son is fortunate enough to play one inning on another level I hope it is close enough for us to see that game too but at least I know I had one REALLY GOOD SEASON and I gave it all I had without any regrets.See ya at the field.
Trudy
First game is Friday, February 18th
